Monica Coash

The following comments were posted by family, friends, and colleagues of Monica Coash.

Dear Auntie Monica, I had a lot of fun making beads with you. I loved when you bought me that littest pet shop. We loved swimming at Vicki's house. I liked it when you took me to the beach and we swam in the ocean. I loved it when we had sleep overs with you and Mary Jo. I loved it when you took me to the zoo and we fed the polar bears ice fish popsicles and going into the gorilla habitat and leaving them gorilla food and treats. I will write more later.

My fondest memory of Monica was one summer at the Future Problem Solving Program International Conference in Rhode Island. I was a Texas FPSP State Director, and Monica was the New Mexico FPSP State Director at that time. Chris Funderburgh and I went with Monica and another teacher from New Mexico to go sight-seeing in Newport, Rhode Island. We had the best time! Monica was such fun to be with!! I still have a mug she brought to me from New Mexico.

In the last few days, I have been praying for a miracle for Monica and for your family. And I also prayed that all of you would experience peace and joy in this most difficult time. As I read your e-mails, it was clear to me that your family was surrounding Monica with the love and the strength that she needed. And I hope in some way that she felt the prayers of others around the world. And maybe, that is the miracle that I was praying for. Monica certainly touched so many. As a Future Problem Solving Affiliate Director, I did not know Monica very well; but I know that she was indeed a special person. Every AD that I've met is so talented, so dedicated and so committed to the kids in the program. You were all so blessed to have a sister, a daughter and a friend like Monica. I wish I could be there in the coming days when you have a chance to celebrate her life! And, personally, I hope that you'll have a chance to read the words of the hymn--"On Eagle's Wings." They always bring comfort and hope to me in times of sorrow--especially the words, "And I will raise you up on eagle's wings, bear you on the breath of dawn, make you to shine like the sun, and hold you in the palm of my hand." I know that Monica is now in the palm of our Lord's hand. May you all find comfort and peace in the days ahead. With love

There are not words I can write to tell you awful I feel. Monica had become reacquainted the past few years. We went to Annunciation back in the 60's. I saw how much she meant to her students and the impact she made on their lives. Her spirit will never die and live in the hearts of all those she touched and that was as you stated thousands. Please be a comfort to your parents as they need you so badly at this most difficult time. Know that if you and your family need anything you ask and I will there. If you need help at the reception after her funeral call me I would be happy to wait for your guests so you and your family and her friends can attend the funeral. Please let me help.

May God give you the strength you need to get through this. I have lost 2 brothers to cancer - one to bone cancer and the other one to stomach cancer. One was 32 and the other one 42 years old. Let us know about funeral or memorial services. Keeping you in my prayers.

I have worked with Monica at IC (FPSP) for a number of years. She has always been a friend to everyone she meets there and has provided a real role model of leadership for all of us. When ever there is something to be done, Monica would step right up, ready to get her hands dirty if that was needed. Her ready laugh and sense of humor will keep her in my memory. I'll miss her!

I am missing Monica so much. My heart aches constantly for her and for you all. The tears cannot stop flowing. I'm so overwhelmed with thoughts. It's so difficult to know where to start or what to say. So, I'll just start rambling and get some of it out. There are so many wonderful things to say about your daughter, sister, aunt, and friend. I can hear Monica's voice saying things over and over in my head. I love her sense of humor, her candor, her opinions, her ideas, her thoughts . . . And just the way she communicates in all ways. She is truly a wonderful woman. Her energy is boundless. She accomplished more in a day than many people do in a lifetime. If Monica wanted to do something, she would do it and she wouldn't wait for tomorrow. What a wonderful way to live. As I'm adjusting to not being able to call Monica on the phone, I hope I learn to spend more time with her in my heart and soul. That is one thought that comforts me. I feel her presence and want to continue feeling it forever. Her impact on my life has really made a difference. She had a way of pushing me to go out beyond my limits and I never regretted it. Because of Monica I got involved in a Russian pen pal program with my students, I got to go to Yale for a summer studies course about Russia, and met many wonderful friends of hers. All of those were positive life-changing experiences for myself as well as my family. How grateful I am for Monica. Over the past couple of weeks I've gotten to know her family a little bit and what special people you all are. No wonder Monica is such an angel! You were all her angels and helped her get through the past couple of weeks with such grace and strength. You are all truly amazing. You are Monica's miracle. Thank you for sharing your daughter, sister, aunt, and friend with us. It was an honor to get to scratch her back, put lotion on her, help her to the bathroom, and help her get a shower. We are so fortunate to have Monica to love. Please know we are grieving with you. We want to help in any way possible. I believe there is a lot of work ahead of you and we are ready to help out in any way. We can clean, cook, call people, help with any type of arrangement, or anything you need. We're your servants, please call on us. Love

I considered it the greatest honor to have been with you last saturday. Thank you for your kind words, but know that anything I may have done was simply an honor and priviledge for me. Monica was a great friend, counsellor and teacher. There are many people who will give you advise on how to invest in this world. I thank the Lord that some people like Monica can see that true value, worth and wealth is found when you invest in people. Monica was my teacher through four years of High school. I honestly have a hard time remembering the first time I met her because she had a way of instantly developing a rapport with students that bypassed any awkwardness. This was important, because, I am speaking for myself and maybe some others, that I was awkward when I met her, and I still am. But this was her magic, her talent, and her passion. The ability to take kids who were a bit “gifted” or “challenged” or “normal” during a time that is inherently hard and challenging and making us feel proud of ourselves and who we are. Then to challenge us not only to look beyond high school and to what we could become, but see that we were empowered today to solve problems. I was one of her Future problem solvers. When I explained this program to people I would describe how we would systematically and creatively approach growing or future problems. What I have come to realize about this program was not the emphasis on future problems to solve, but the emphasis on problem solvers for the future. Monica knew this and never forgot what was important. I will miss her dearly. I have so many more stories to share. Each one demonstrates that she, as a friend and teacher, helped shape me into the person I am today. He is risen, and because of this I will get to laugh with Monica again. Lots of Love

Things Monica Taught Me. 10. Call all your friends and family often. 9. Do more than everyone else around you. 8. Do it better than everyone else around you. 7. Live life to the fullest. 6. Always speak the truth, no matter what. 5. Make the whole world your classroom. 4. Spread laughter all around. 3. Make everyone you meet your friend. 2. Follow your heart and stay true to yourself. 1. You will live on forever in the hearts of those you touched. I love you and miss you, Monica! Love

Many people didn't attend so I thought I would share it here. If punctuation or grammar is not correct, it is because it was meant for only me to read, however, I thought it might be important to include it. I was honored when Maryjoe asked me to say something at Monica’s rosary because maybe it meant that I was almost as important to Monica as she is to me. It will be difficult to sum a 21 year friendship with a force of nature like Monica in about 5 minutes, but I’ll try to do so. I remember the first time I met Monica in the summer of 1985, when I arrived at Karen’s and her door to become their new roommate. She seemed so excited to meet me and happy that Karen was going to have a friend from home living out here. She helped me get a teaching job at Eisenhower middle school and introduced me to a multitude of people in a matter of days. We quickly became friends. It wasn’t because we were so much alike, because we weren’t; it was because it was so easy to talk and laugh with her. When we couldn’t sleep on the train to Chicago that summer, we stayed up all night talking and eating all the goodies her mother had packed for us. I’ll never forget the look on Karen and Dina’s face the next morning when we told them we ate all the food. Believe it or not, Monica had an innocent, childlike side. In Chicago, my sister, Karen and I (being the seasoned Chicagoans we were,) quickly avoided a character in a black trench coat. Seeing Monica this man opened his coat showing her all his gold jewelry, watches and other merchandise. I’ll never forget Monica’s call “Hey guys come look at all this great jewelry!” Whenever strong personalities become friends, there are problems. We were no exception. There were months at a time when we didn’t talk to each other. Our lives took different paths, but she was always there. Thanks to Monica, I now use phrases like; cadywompus, And “Whatever blows your dress up!” She was a bridesmaid at my wedding; seeing me through my bridezilla phase and still liking me afterwards. For every happy event in my life, she helped throw the shower. She was my friend through the saddest times in my life and the happiest. When my father was diagnosed with cancer on the same week that I was to move my family into our new home, she saw that I was too shocked to pack my things so she organized everyone to help. After I became a mother, I didn’t see her as much as I would have liked. I let the daily routine of raising two rambunctious boys and teaching full time get in the way. Still we found time to go to the occasional happy hour, lunch in Chimayo and celebrate birthdays and Christmas. When Motherhood or marriage seemed too much for me to cope with, she brought me back to reality and made me realize how lucky I was. She could bring out the worst and the best in me. She gave me a kick in the butt when I needed it, but she also lifted me up. Now that my boys are older I thought I would have more time to make things up to my close friends. I truly never imagined this would happen to Monica. I really thought she was indestructible. I always pictured our little group of friends as old women, complaining, laughing and yelling at each other. When I was sobbing in her hospital room, she said “Don’t you worry, I’ll visit you to make sure you and Justin don’t do anything stupid, AND YOU’D BETTER NOT BE FIGHTING!” She has taught me what friendship really is. She has taught me how to cherish my life and family.

We spent some years together in the Chi Omega house on the UNM campus and spent many hours laughing! I had only recently run into her again and was hoping we could become reacquainted. What a loss, she will be missed! Love, Cheri

What I remember most fondly about Monica was her response when I tried to get FPS going in our area. I was so frustrated, because every one would listen politey, but no one would jump in with me. Monica reminded me that any team was better than no team, and I could do that on my own. She was always there to answer questions, and always made me feel as if I was an important and loved member of the FPS program, even though my distance from Albuquerque often kept me from getting to attend events. I will truely miss her, and believe that it will take a lot of work from all of us to keep the program at the level that Monica maintained.

First, I would like to say I am very sorry for your loss. I only met Monica once, but she was an outstanding and loving individual. It saddens me to realize we have loss such a valuable person that cares and loves children so much. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. With Sympathy and Loving Memories.

After the school event she went to the parking lot and the old Chevy was still locked except the keys were in it and the Engine was still running../ Needless to say she had to call Papa to bring the extra keys.. We love You MONICA

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